How to Stop Apologizing for your Beauty and Light
from our Angel Messenger Creative Team
Do you feel like you’re constantly apologizing for who you are? If you’re raising your hand, you’re not alone. Most of us say “I’m sorry” all the time, but we seldom do it for anything we do wrong.
Instead, we often apologize for being beautiful and happy, and for carrying our light and positive energy with us. It might be a common habit, but it’s a bad one. And the sooner you break it, the better!
Here’s how to stop apologizing for your beauty and light.
Why do we apologize all the time?
If you’re a woman reading this, you may find that this topic resonates with you on a deep level. This isn’t a women’s issue per se. Both men and women apologize when they shouldn’t, but it seems like women do this more often, and research confirms this.
According to one study, men apologize when they believe they’ve done something wrong – just like women. The big difference is that women think they’re doing something wrong a lot more than men.
But why do women have this constant need to apologize? Here are five possible reasons. Do any of them sound familiar?
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Imposter syndrome
Imposter syndrome doesn’t discriminate. Women from every age and situation can suffer from it. Self-doubt, insecurity, and the fear of being “found out” and seen as a fraud make us apologize when we shouldn’t.
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Constant and chronic guilt
According to life coach and psychologist, Melanie Greenberg, Ph.D., the guilt women feel can be chalked up to thousands of years of socialization.
But that’s not the whole picture. Childhood trauma, PTSD and depression can make women feel “excessive or inappropriate guilt.”
Therefore, it’s important to remember that if your life includes these experiences, it’s okay to get help so you can heal these deep emotional and psychological wounds. (In short, don’t apologize for needing and/or wanting help!)
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Lack of self-respect
Dr. Marsha Linehan, the founder of the behavioral research center, Lineman Institute, says that “hypersensitive, a superfluous apology can reflect a lack of self-respect and identity.”
So, it’s worth asking yourself: Is not having a strong sense of self, or having low self-esteem, the reason why I am constantly apologizing?
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Self-image
Do you want to protect and project your self-image?
For example, women want to appear polite, instead of rude. Or, they want to appear cooperative, rather than difficult. We also don’t want to be dismissed as being weak when we have emotions and express them.
So, we apologize for who we are, hoping people will see someone else – someone other than who we really are.
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Fear of rejection
Everyone is on their own spiritual and emotional journey, but the truth is, many people carry a lot of pain and fear inside them. This means they’re vibrating at a low frequency.
Since we don’t want to be left out or rejected, we will often abandon our own beauty and light – our higher energetic frequency – to fit in with someone’s lower frequency.
It makes them feel better and less threatened. Plus, it guarantees that we don’t get rejected.
These are five possible reasons why women apologize for who they are. And no matter why you apologize for your beauty and light, the consequences are always negative.
What happens when you apologize for your beauty and light
It takes a lot of mindfulness, awareness, and practice to live your truth and be genuine. So, after all this “work”, why would you lower yourself to feel shame and guilt?
It calls to mind Marianne Williamson’s immortal quote, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.”
When you apologize for your beauty and light, you’re not just saying a meaningless “Sorry”. You’re actually removing yourself from love, and the highest vibration that comes with it.
Instead of loving who you are and allowing yourself to shine, you censor your true self and leave yourself in a dark corner.
It’s like saying that who you are, your energy, your light, and your consciousness are not only unimportant but something to disregard.
How to stop apologizing for being beautiful and bright
Here are simple, yet powerful ways to stop apologizing and to start shining instead. They are simple, but they won’t always be easy. But once you release yourself from your feelings of guilt, shame and unworthiness, it becomes easier.
- Say “Thank you” instead of “I’m sorry.”
- Ask yourself: What am I really sorry for? Did I actually do anything wrong?
- Think about women who are confident and unapologetic. They are so attractive, aren’t they? Can you emulate them?
- Do you feel inadequate, not good enough, not worthy enough? Try a meditation in which you see yourself surrounded by love and light. This is who you are.
- Learn to love yourself
- Learn to accept yourself
- Instead of being ashamed of your blunders and “imperfections”, learn to smile at them with compassion.
- Spend time with people who love you and accept you for who you are.
- Realize that it’s 100% OK to:
- Love yourself
- Forgive yourself
- Put yourself first
- Say no to things that aren’t right for you
- Like the way you look
- Make your own choices
- Not get sucked into other people’s negative drama
- Have your own ideas
- Make mistakes
- Want more in life
If you apologize for your beauty and light, it’s probably an old habit. And as we all know, old habits die hard. But you can – and absolutely should! – replace them.
When you stop apologizing for your beauty and light, you can finally start to show up in life as the beautiful person you are, living your truth and inspiring others to do the same.
P.S. This article is the sixth in a new project we are working on called “Beauty“. Our team has decided that it is vitally important to help bring beauty into the world in whatever way we can and to help others to do the same. For now, we have several articles planned to publish on this topic but are of course open to where Spirit may lead us. We hope that you will follow our project and that it helps you.
Much Love & Angel Blessings,
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