How Do I Forgive Myself?
This is a guest post by Valerie where she answers a reader’s question …
“I was wondering if you could help me understand how to forgive myself. My childhood was not that great, and I try my best to be a good mother to my children but make a lot of mistakes. I’ve read a lot of books on how to be a better parent, and I’m doing much better, but I can’t get over the things I’ve done in the past. My children have forgiven me, but I can’t forgive myself.” ~ Anna
Dear Anna,
Here is what I got from the angels in response to your question as to how you can forgive yourself:
“Realize there’s nothing to forgive. You’re always doing the best you can, so how can you expect more of yourself than that? Who’s ideal are you trying to live up to? The past is the past and you can’t change it. What you can do is learn the lessons from the circumstances with which you’ve been presented, and then move on. If someone else had done the things you have, would you be able to forgive her? If yes, then you need to be as compassionate and generous with your forgiveness with yourself as you would be with another.”
Next I pulled cards from the “Messages from Your Angels” deck and these are the ones that came up for you:
Bethany – “When you take excellent care of yourself, everybody benefits. Give yourself a relaxing treat today such as a massage, sea salt bath, or pedicure.”
Stop being so hard on yourself. Treat yourself with the same kindness you so readily treat others.
Grace and Antoinette – “To help heal the situation, see the other person’s point of view with compassion.”
In this case, they are suggesting you may find it easier to forgive yourself if you take a third person’s perspective. See yourself as you would one of your children, your best friend, or someone else you love. Be as understanding and forgiving of yourself as you would be with them.
Omega – “Victory! Your desire is coming to fruition. Keep up the good work!”
Instead of putting so much attention on those few things you feel you’ve done “wrong” in the past, focus on all of the things you’ve done that you’re proud of. Remember, nothing is ever “good” or “bad,” “right” or “wrong” – only your judgment makes it so. Release the judgments so you can see the light and love within you. When you can do that, you’ll finally be able to forgive yourself.
Angel Blessings,
Valerie
This post was brought to you today by Valerie using Doreen Virtue’s Messages From Your Angels Oracle Cards.
Valerie is a gifted Angel Psychic and Card Reader who once offered her services here through Angel Messenger. However, Valerie no longer offers these services.
Get your own Message From Your Angels with a Free Online Angel Card Reading.
Thank you. It was a very good flow of cards reading with comfort, healing and wisdom.
Glad you enjoyed the information. Blessings to you
That’s okay Sheri 🙂
That is a good point about parenting, i’m not a parent, but I can see how things are passed down from generations until somebody becomes conscious and does something about the pattern. Unfortunately this usually takes a while. And definately, if somebody is asking the question, it is the first step!
🙂
-Ben
Thank you, Ben. It’s so very true that not being able to forgive yourself can can be caused from your own past hurts. Especially in cases of parenting, we tend to know only how to repeat the cycles of what happened in our own childhood, and sometimes that means guilt and feelings of unworthiness stack upon one another. Reaching out, though, and asking for help is a brave step. It means Anna is ready to forgive herself and her past; she is ready for something better … like you said that letting go will help her life to improve. It’s a big step, but it’s an important one. Finally getting to that place means healing can begin.
IT worries me ” nothing is really good or bad” I feel the meaning yet there are things kind and not kind, and if somebody was hurt / abused it is clearly bad. It is not only about own judgments
Yeah taking care of yourself is one important part, doing things you like.. that relax you.
Another part of this that I believe in strongly, is letting go of everything that is stopping you from forgiving yourself.
Such as intense emotions your holding onto, anger, hate, frustration, insecurity and also past experiences that have caused this and made it hard to forgive yourself.. that is when it really starts to happen. And you realize maybe it wasn’t so bad, that you really are a good person and your life will improve!
-Ben
Thanks for writing, Elizabeth! I’m glad you enjoyed your reading with Fawn. 🙂
I recently had a mini reading with Fawn. It was very uplifting and encouraging. Thank you, Fawn, and Thank you Rev. Sheri.Blessings.