Harmonizing Hardships in 5 Steps

What is the purpose of the challenges and hardships that we go through?  We learn a great deal about ourselves when we are faced with challenges.  We are incredibly flexible and resilient.  We get pushed and pulled into situations in our life, things get twisted and turned up-side down, yet we all have the amazing ability to bounce back. 

We all have carried around pain and hurt from the past to some extent- whether it was past disappointments or failed expectations.  Some of us hold on to it very tightly which makes it harder to let go.  It’s very easy to take things personal when something unpleasant is happening to us.  The truth is, if we live on planet earth, we will have many different experiences; some we perceive as good, some we perceive as not so good.  We live on this planet with both lightness and darkness.  We can’t pretend there aren’t any problems on earth, because that is not realistic.  When things are going well in our life, we can easily express joy, excitement, gratitude and love – without effort.  But what about times in life when things are not what you had hoped for, when life has appeared to let you down.  It can be easy to see things in a negative way and personalize it. 

angelsbringlightBut when something challenging happens to us, it can drive us into action beyond what we thought we were capable of.  A challenging experience can push our limits beyond measure, which creates motivation to move forward.  Sometimes a challenge in life is what drives us to learn more, and through the growth and experience of our own lessons, we can be of great service to others who may need help. 

So, how can we move on from challenges?  There are 5 steps that have helped me move on:


The 1st thing is to be fully aware of what has happened.  It’s accepting the reality of what has taken place.  We can’t go back in time, the past is already done.  We have to accept that the challenging experience did happen.


The next step is to allow yourself to grieve.  Give yourself time to process your emotions.  If you feel angry, find a safe outlet to release your anger; such as screaming in to a pillow, running it out on a treadmill, writing your honest feelings- then shredding it.

Allow your emotions to surface- do not stuff them down- because they will reappear over & over until you can release them. 


Get out in nature.  Find a peaceful, beautiful, clean area outdoors that you can go to.  Breathe in the fresh air and disconnect from the busy world.  Turn off your phone and allow your entire mind, body and soul to be in nature.

Getting connected to nature will instantly re-charge your batteries and help move out old toxic energy.  Mother earth transmutes negative energy and transforms it to positive energy.  It makes a world of difference once you spend time outdoors.  After spending time outside, I find there is also a greater sense of clarity.  And this takes us to the next step.


This step is finding the lessons in the challenge.  What did you learn about yourself while you were going through a difficult period?  Is there anything you can see differently now that you may not have been able to see back then?  Is there anything you feel you could have done differently, or was the situation completely out of your control? 

This is not to beat yourself up- that does not serve us in any way.  By finding the lessons in our challenges helps us to move through the energy- we won’t need to repeat these experiences over and over.  When we can see the deeper meaning, it can help us grow wiser, and gives us new tools that will be helpful on our life journey.


And the final step I find really helpful to move through and process things are by sharing your experiences with others who may benefit by hearing your story.  You have grown wiser, stronger, and developed new life skills that can be really helpful to someone who may be going through a similar experience. 

You may feel guided to journal about your challenges- and after a period of writing- from where you were in the beginning- to the middle and the end of your challenge- you’ll see how much you’ve learned- how much strength you’ve had- and you will eventually be able to see the gifts that came out of your experience. 

When I say gifts, often you’ll find gifts of;

  • increased strength
  • increased courage
  • taking action when you were timid- but did it anyway
  • gifts of wisdom and new spiritual understanding

Earth is truly a school, and we are the students.  We’re here to learn and grow.  Having life experiences- both pleasant and painful- will help us evolve.  We’re never alone on our life journey.  The angels bring light to the dark, to help us see things more clearly.  We grow stronger and wiser from the experiences we have in life.  The angels love us all and are here for us all. 

Angel Blessings ~ 

Heidi Mentink

About Heidi

Heidi is a published author and wonderful Angel card reader who has trained with numerous spiritual teachers from all over the world - including Doreen Virtue and the Boulder Psychic Institute. She was one of our original Tested and Trusted Angel Messenger Practitioners and has been a contributing author here at Angel Messenger.

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4 replies
  1. Paula
    Paula says:

    Hi, this came at a good time for me……. thank you. My mother passed unexpectedly a few months ago and I have found it hard to come to terms with. I am juggling my grief with demanding uni studies and it is a bit of a challenge to say the least!

    Your post made me feel more at ease with everything 🙂

  2. Kristen
    Kristen says:


    This was most apprciated after going through a divorce from being
    married for 18 years. I waited for someone 19 years to only be left 6
    month later. He told lies and was deceitful for over a year before i ever
    knew. All of this while being homeless with our children. I have accepted
    this because of having no other choice. I have been angry, hurt and filled with
    pain. Lately I have been walking and spending time outside and it helps
    clear your mind tremdously. I can say the lessons Ive learned were for
    my benefit in discovering who I am and what I would like in my life. I feel
    God has set me free to find myself from being very lost. I became a mom and
    wife and thats all I knew but I am so much more. I share my story but I know
    of the gifts you speak of because they help keep you going when all else doesnt.

    Thank you for the encourgement and wise words of wisdom but most of all
    thank you for the comfirmation that I am on the right path and working
    towards my highest good and purpose in life.

    Love, light and Angel blessings,


    • Heidi M
      Heidi M says:

      Hi Kristen,

      Thank you for reaching out and sharing your story. Your courage and strength to move forward in challenging times is incredibly inspiring. Thank you for commenting and allowing others to read about the challenges you have experienced and how you are working through it. Much love, healing and angel blessings to you ~ Heidi Mentink


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