Ordering Pizza

When the Yogi got the pizza, he gave the proprietor a $20 bill. The proprietor pocketed the bill. The Yogi said "Don't I get change?" The proprietor said, "Change must come from within."

Buddha Humor

Q: Why did it take the Buddha forever to vacuum his sofa? A: Because he didn't have any attachments.

Freedom

Freedom is nothing but a chance to be better. ~Albert Camus Happy Independence Day!

George Carlin Message

Isn't it amazing that George Carlin - comedian of the 70's and 80's - could write something so very eloquent...and so very appropriate. A Message by George Carlin: The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but…

Astrological Prayers

Astrological Prayers · Aries Dear God, please give me patience... and could you do it right now? · Taurus Dear God, help me accept change, but not too quick. · Gemini Dear God! Who is God? Where is God? Why is God? · Cancer Dear…

The Atheist

The Atheist An atheist was spending a quiet day fishing when suddenly his boat was attacked by a three-headed monster. In one easy flip, the beast tossed him and his boat high into the air. Then it opened its mouth to swallow them both. As…

Discounted Massage

LCC MASSAGE CLINIC NEEDS CLIENTS JULY 8 thru 31 Tuesdays & Thursdays Appt. times: 12:15 & 2:00 $20.00 for Public $15.00 for LCC Students & Staff Call 483-1451 to schedule appointment & get more details

The Echo of Life

The Echo of Life A man and his son were walking in the forest. Suddenly the boy trips and feeling a sharp pain he screams "Ahhhhhhhhh". Surprised he hears a voice coming from the mountain, "Ahhhhhhhhh"! Filled with curiosity, he screams:…

Important Words

Important Words The six most important words in the English language are: "I admit I made a mistake." The five most important words in the English language are: "You did a good job." The four most important words in the English language…

Kids Are Not Stupid

A clergyman was walking down the street when he came upon a group of about a dozen boys, all of them between 10 and 12 years of age. The group surrounded a dog. Concerned lest the boys were hurting the dog, he went over and asked “What…

Our New Little Friend

We have a new little friend at my house.  It lives on my side porch, has four legs, is furry, and says "mew".  What can I say?  I am a sucker for animals, and this one is only 6-7 weeks old.  My husband has made it very clear in the past…

I Created You

I Created You One day, as usually, an orphan, a little girl, stood at the street corner begging for food, money or whatever she could get. Now, this girl was wearing very tattered clothes, was dirty and quite dishevelled. A well-to-do you…