Ask Sheri – Ruth

“I had an abortion two years ago and it is eating me up inside as it went against everything i believe in. Have you any messages from the angels for me?”  – Ruth

While I realize my commenting on a question involving abortion will likely invite anger and criticism from some of my readers, I will jump in with both feet because this is something that needs healing.  It is not my intention to offend or upset anyone, so I apologize in advance if this message is offensive.  However, as I said, this is something that needs healing.  Healing is my intention.  This response is meant for all those who have lost a child through abortion.

Dear Ruth,

“Let he who is without sin cast the first stone … ”  We could quote Bible verses back and forth all day, but no one can argue that none of us are perfect, and no human being has the right to tell you that he/she is any better or more worthy of forgiveness. No one but yourself has any right to chastise you for your decision, though I’m sure others would have no problem making their opinions known.

I have done readings for many, many people who have lost babies to either miscarriage or abortion, and I can tell you what my experience has been with these souls.  First, I pick up the loss of a child through both miscarriage and abortion the same way.  It comes through to me as a soul who didn’t incarnate and is usually still around the mother or another close family member.  Before I get further, let me explain that this does not mean the child’s soul is stuck or earthbound in any way.  Honestly, they usually come through as a protective spirit.  Sometimes, they will stay around the family because they intend to incarnate again.  This could be with the same mother or another person in the family – possibly someone who would have been a sibling.

The thing that breaks my heart in matters like these is when a mother allows this decision to negatively affect the rest of her life.  I know there are those out there who would have several negative things to add to my response here, but I’m not concerned about them, and neither should you be.  I can only comment based on my knowledge and experiences, and I can tell you that never have I had a soul come to me and express that they are in any turmoil after being lost.  In fact, the souls I do pick up on usually express love and concern for the mother.  I believe the ones that stay with their families are there for a reason.  Maybe they weren’t able to incarnate, but they can still be a part of life.  Abortion is a very personal and very difficult decision.  I am not here to tell anyone whether it’s right or wrong, but I do believe it was your choice to make.  We all have free will.  The choices we make define us, that’s true.  But, it can also be said that our reactions to those choices define us even more.

Do you allow what cannot be changed to weigh so heavily on your heart forever, or do you release it and let it go?  I don’t know what brought you to the point of your decision, but I can tell you that your life now is craving balance.  You need something in your life that makes you feel normal and safe.  I feel like you’ve recently been through a bit of an emotional storm where maybe you even felt like your freedom and sense of being were at stake.  You’ve defined yourself by others standards for quite some time.  Maybe it’s time to let go and be who you are.  Just be.  Let go of what has been, and be willing to live for today.

Punishing yourself isn’t going to change the past, and it certainly isn’t going to help you be who you need to be. This is your message, Ruth.  Please try to let go of your sadness.  This is a loss just like the loss of any other family member, only you place all the blame on yourself.  But, what if there didn’t need to be any blame?  What if it was all just circumstance, and you simply made the best decision you were able to make at the time?  Does that make it your fault?  You might want to think it does, but I will tell you I don’t get that here.  I don’t feel any blame coming from the other side.  There is no blame, no anger, coming from anyone over there … not your family members and not the soul who didn’t incarnate.  Are there others here who punish and blame you, or are you doing this to yourself?  I wish I were there to give you a big hug and help you let this go.  You aren’t the only chance that soul will have to come into this world, and you didn’t make the decision lightly.  If you need permission to forgive yourself, please take it.  Ruth, I give you permission to forgive yourself.  Please love yourself enough to allow forgiveness to heal your broken heart.

Much love and blessings,


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Rev. Sheri is an advocate for spiritual growth and education who is dedicated to helping others communicate with Heaven – without the need for an intermediary.

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